Real Talk: Vacationing with Kids Isn’t Really a Vacation — And It Can Still Be Good

We’ve teamed up with our dear friends at Michigan Family Travel on a series about Mental Health & Traveling. Be sure to check them out for all the best when it comes to fun and easy travel adventures in Michigan.

The car is packed to the brim, everyone’s buckled in, and you’re finally ready to set off on your family’s obligatory Up North Michigan summer vacation. You’ve spent weeks planning and coordinating, of course scouring the Michigan Family Travel website for family-friendly activities. You’ve checked and double-checked your packing list — swimsuits, sunblock, first aid kit, so many snacks, your child’s can’t-sleep-without-it stuffed animal, and of course… that special rash cream.

Wait—did you remember the rash cream?

Too late now.

You’re leaving after work on Friday (with the rest of the lower part of the state) in hopes that the kids will sleep in the car and you’ll have a peaceful drive up I-75 while catching up on your favorite podcasts. For weeks, you have been entertaining visions of sitting on the beach with a good book while your kids frolic in the sand and waves. This is it. Finally.

Record scratch.
Not even an hour into your four-hour drive, the kids are crying. One had an accident, and they swear they didn’t have to go when you reminded them to just try before getting in the car. The other is “starving” (despite rejecting the carefully curated snacks you packed — which are now crushed into the floor mats) and they don’t want to listen to your boring podcasts anymore. Oh and they’re both enraged and fighting about who can looks out who’s window. 

Three and a half (because stops) exhausting and trying hours later, you arrive, disheveled and on the verge of tears. It’s raining while you haul in the endless amounts of bags and stuff while trying to keep an eye on the kids running back and forth. Dinner and bedtime are full of meltdowns — theirs and yours. And suddenly, you wonder… Did we make a huge mistake?

If this sounds familiar, it’s because vacationing with kids often doesn’t feel like a vacation at all. You’re still parenting — just in a new location, without your usual comforts, routines, or support. But it doesn’t have to be miserable. With some realistic planning (and a bit of letting go), family trips can still be enjoyable — or at least survivable.

Here are 7 tips to help make traveling with little ones more manageable — and maybe even a little fun…

Plan Loosely

Choose one main activity per day. That’s it. Anything extra is a bonus. Over planning sets you up for stress and disappointment when things inevitably shift.

Stick (Loosely) to Routines

If your kids are early risers who need breakfast first thing, don’t plan to sleep in and stroll leisurely to that cute coffee shop. Honor nap/quiet times when you can — it gives everyone a break (you included!).

Take Turns

If you’re traveling with a partner or another adult, tag team. One morning they do breakfast duty while you take a solo coffee run. Build in small breaks so you each get time to recharge.

Protect Sleep

Tired kids are cranky kids. Try to maintain bedtime and sleep routines — even if that means skipping that late-night boardwalk trip. You know your kid best; choose what’s worth the tradeoff.

Be Present (When You Can)

Yes, you’ve heard it before — but noticing the little joyful moments can shift the energy: a lopsided sandcastle, sticky ice cream faces, an impromptu car dance party. Be in it when it feels good.

And Check Out When You Need To

You don’t need to be engaged every second. It’s okay to read your book while they play in the sand, or scroll your phone in the hotel room during nap time. Give yourself permission to rest, too.

Manage Expectations

And communicate them — especially with your partner. If your kids are little, you might not get that cocktail at the beach bar or even a full chapter in your book. That’s not failure — that’s life. Know what’s realistic, and don’t expect magic just because you’re away from home.

Finally, Hang In There

Family vacations do get (a bit) easier as kids get older and more independent — but that doesn’t mean you have to wait until then to enjoy time away together. While you may not “cherish every moment” (because let’s be real — some of them are objectively awful), these trips can still create connection, memories, and funny stories you’ll laugh about later.

With some patience and a lot of deep breaths, it doesn’t have to be a total disaster. Maybe you come home with a sunburn, some mosquito bites, and sand absolutely everywhere — seriously why is it everywhere?! — but also with a little less stress and a quiet reminder that you're doing a really good job.

At the end of the day, vacations with kids are less about relaxation and more about shifting expectations. There will be chaos. There will be crumbs. And yes, there will be moments when you wonder why you even bothered. But if you can build in flexibility, humor, and grace (especially for yourself), you might just return with a few golden memories tucked between the tantrums.

—E